Its been just 15 days I m back from home after DP vacations, but I surely missed the auspicious diwali & our great chhath puja. For we bihari’s chhath puja is very pious & is the biggest festival. We can afford to miss any festival away from home but we can’t afford to leave this one in particular. It has great importance in our life & belief. I have been captive in this college since the day I got into my Alma. It’s not that I donn love my college, I certainly do, but I hate the principal & the vice-principle with their fucking set of rules. This isnt a local or religious puja of Orissa so we don’t have holidays here. But yeah this is something, when every one certainly misses home badly…as much as I do.
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Since, I had the chance of attending the puja only in the 2nd year. It was awesome carrying the basket laden with puja materials, fruits, prasads, big bunches of banana, long long sticks of sugar-cane on the head, the males in the family are given the opportunity to carry it bare footed up to the ghaat (pond, river source), I started carrying when i was in 10th coz the elder son takes on the onus as its considered very holy. I have been enjoying this puja till my 12th it’s always awesome!
Last time in the 3rd year, I couldn’t go home as the internals (alias; mids) were scheduled. It wasn’t a great deal to miss out, but couldn’t go home anyway... missed home badly! So did mom missed me…his only but talented son, she couldn’t talk to me for her voice has gone heavy & she was crying the last time. I had decided to go home next time even if it accounted me to miss the mids.
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But...as we say “history repeats itself & it did” the cliché has been true. This time too the mids are scheduled at the same time when the chhath puja is. I had always wanted to go home, but couldn’t decide. Called mom & had a talk with her, asked her if I can home, 2 days earlier the puja? She wanted me to come home, but she candidly denied. She said it’s been only 15 days I have returned from the DP vacations, so advised me to just relax. She said, “It would be hectic on your part to travel”. I refuted her; said it’s not gonna be a great problem but she wanted me to stay & continue with the internals. I was very eager to leave the mids as its now has become a stale thing…any how it was decide that: I have just returned from the vacations so it was better for me to stay & continue with the studies as mommy says often.
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Today is 4th Nov…it’s a day, I ll always commemorate…No, no, nah, I guess I won’t forget this day for the reason I guess my blog reader’s know well…”The great engineering picnic of EEE roadies”. Today it was the 2nd day of internals & they were pretty okay as I was the 1st one to come out…I mean finish the paper from my hall in both the sittings; all the thanks goes to Rahul & he may forward it to persons whom he likes (as they helped him to get the Qs before). An hour with Rahul before the internals and I m sure that I m not going to fail, I may sound pessimist but I bet U, It wouldn’t have sound better if I would have said the other way round i.e. I m going to pass…(hahaa).
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It was the 1st day of the puja, where mommy pays all the tribute & worships chhathi maiya (maiya: mom) our religious name, gives water to her as a symbol of respect & utter faith to the setting sun in the ghaat (pond or river side). Papa would have carried the prestigious & religious basket over his head bare-footed to the ghaath & my sis (a lil fatty) would have all the pleasures listening to her new i-pod (although a duplicate one, but for her it’s an i-pod…let it B).
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Its was PAPA calling on my cell today evening & it was mom wanted to talk...hiding her heavy voice & pretending that she's fine but she wasn't. I knew it as there was nothing much to talk about followed by her silly Q. After some time she couldn’t resist & bursted out…crying over. She said, “son I have denied you to come but don’t feel like doing anything without you. All these festivals are chore without you” & cried over phone. Oh! it was so pinching, I just wanted to rush out & reach home, if I could, but I couldn't…I really couldn't. I thought I should have gone yaar…internals weren’t a big deal. Mommy would have felt better, even I would have done the puja ah ! missed it out all over again. But on the other hand Junaid (JUNI) was walking along with me returning from Sanjay’s home. Well I said mom “come’on mommy stop crying its okay, it’s been just 15 days I have come”, imagine I m iterating the dialogue which mommy has patented. But who can stop those tears it were out for her only but talented son, wouldn’t mind if U wish to throw the talented out of it, those tears would engulf & fill the eyes of every mom in the world when her son or daughter is away from home in the festivals & special occasions, may be Christmas, E-id or whatever…I reconciled mom saying, “mom there are a lot of friends who missed-out the puja as they were so long distance apart from their home at least for them please stop crying who would escort them if I fly out to you for I m nearer. We all played the chhath song in loud speakers & wanted to feel like being @ home. How honest was the attempt mommy? Okay now stop crying it won’t be good if u break out again”, its hurts…By any means no 1 in this whole world can make her stop crying except herself. I bet U, but again it’s MOM…who has cuddled the world in her laps & my mom is the same, lovely, caring & utterly dies for his only & talented son (hope u r not annoyed). I love her so much I can’t express as I don’t know how to? Some one please teach me…please!
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Tomorrow morning it’s the 2nd day of chhath, when the same puja would be repeated for the rising sun…the auspicious & great puja would end. I can see my mom worshipping, the way the aunties do & it would be the time for the Prassad…its distribution & subscription (I mean sevan). I know my sis is in full profit, she would handle the prassad section. Any ways I won’t be awake to witness the great morning but I can only anticipate it to be as superb as it always was, getting up @ 3am & preparing for the puja which would end by the sun rise & worship.
So tat’s our Chhath-Puja which drives me crazy & I m freaking out as I missed it. No one to blame but the time as I always say & believe: Destiny has surprises in store for me.
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I missed out…this time too, but some day I would surely make it to home @ Chhath-puja & would carry the basket (full of almost everything) bare-footed to the ghaath & would cherish the moments of eternity, utter faith & worship with my family & the community. I guess by that time I would gift her (my sis GUDIYA) the original i-pod which she always dreamt of & I would shed the sin of being her only biggest enemy in the world between her & her i-pod, the way I M today.
I love them…the sentence itself is the only proof of my inner self.
This writing is my tribute to my ever-loving & pious mom, who has been my inspiration.
